Patterns and Characteristics of Co-Dependence

Patterns and Characteristics of Co-Dependence

We suggest that it might be helpful to think of the notations: always, usually, sometimes or never, as one evaluates each item on the checklist.




Denial Patterns:




I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling.

I minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel.

I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others.

Low Self-Esteem Patterns:




I have difficulty making decisions.

I judge everything I think, say or do harshly, as never 'good enough'.

I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts.

I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires.

I value others' approval of my thinking, feelings and behaviour over my own.

I do not perceive myself as a lovable or worthwhile person.

Compliance Patterns:




I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others' anger.

I am very sensitive to how others are feeling and feel the same.

I am extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long.

I value others' opinions and feelings more than my own and am afraid to express differing opinions and feelings of my own.

I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want.

I accept sex when I want love.

Control Patterns:




I believe most other people are incapable of taking care of themselves.

I attempt to convince others of what they 'should' think and how they 'truly' feel.

I become resentful when others will not let me help them.

I freely offer others advice and directions without being asked.

I lavish gifts and favours on those I care about.

I use sex to gain approval and acceptance.

I have to be 'needed' in order to have a relationship with others.